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May's Breath
of
Fresh
Air
from
Akasha...............
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Hi
Everyone,
Welcome to
the May 2008
newsletter and
my apologies to
those of you
who wrote and
asked where
your April
“Breath of
Fresh Air”
was!
I think that
it’s very
likely from now
on that the
newsletter will
be bi-monthly
and I hope
that’s OK with
you.
This month’s
feature “The
Art of
Listening” has
been inspired
by a number of
things.
One, was a
conversation I
was having with
a couple whose
wedding
ceremony I’m
conducting soon
where we were
discussing the
importance of
communication
in a
relationship
and even more
importantly,
the need to
really listen
to each
other.
Another was
addressing a
similar issue
in a
Communications
and
Relationship
program I was
facilitating,
where again,
top of the list
was about
listening to
one
another.
And finally,
was my recent
week long
“Thought for
the Day” topics
for local BBC
Radio, where on
several
occasions, I
emphasised the
importance of
listening as a
means of
understanding
difference and
diversity.
But before we
dive into this
month’s
feature, here’s
the whole
package
outline:
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*
Feature:
The
Art
of
Listening
*
To
Make
you
Smile:
“Am
I
normal?”
*
Because
we
like
them………
*
Really
useful
information
Total
read
time:
5
minutes…..
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Feature:
The Art of
Listening
How do we
listen?
“What a stupid
question – with
our ears of
course!”
But is that
all?
In my book
“How
to Do Life –
powerful
pointers for
powerful
living”, I
included the
Chinese symbol
for the verb
“To listen”
which contains
the
following:
Ears, Mouth,
Eyes, Heart and
Undivided
Attention!
That’s
because real
listening
(sometimes
called Active
Listening), is
a skill that
engages empathy
and compassion.
It requires you
to be 100%
present with
another and
whilst
listening you
notice body
language, skin
tone changes,
the use of
words and their
content as well
as the tone of
voice. It
means that you
have listened
so well that,
if necessary,
you could
repeat what you
have just
heard,
accurately and
in
sequence.
Most arguments
are the result
of faulty
listening.
So what are
some of the
barriers to
listening……here
are a few
suggestions.
See which ones
you identify
with:
Judgements:
It is said that
we take 30
seconds to
decide whether
we like someone
or not.
If we don’t
like them, we
are far less
likely to hear
what they have
to say as we’ll
be busy making
a list of
faults
instead.
Second-guessing:
“Oh yes, I know
what they are
talking about
so I don’t have
to listen
fully.
I’ll just wait
until they
finish speaking
and come up
with what I
want to say or
alternatively,
I might not
wait until they
finish and I’ll
jump in”
Hijacking:
This happens
when you hear
something that
you resonate
with and
immediately
switch the
conversation to
your
experience,
rather than
continue to
listen and
probably find
that the
situation is
actually
different.
How many times
has that
happened to
you?
Do you find it
frustrating?
Do you end up
thinking, “Why
am I even
bothering to
speak?
Filtering:
Most of us have
filters of our
own about
something and
we tend to
listen through
them.
So if you have
a filter for
criticism, then
even if someone
is actually
giving you some
praise, you are
likely not to
hear it because
you will be
listening for
the
negatives.
Rehearsing:
This often goes
with
Filtering.
So if you are
tuned to
hearing
criticism, you
will likely be
rehearsing what
you are going
to say in your
defence,
whether it’s
necessary or
not!
These are
just 5 barriers
that will stop
us from truly
connecting with
someone else
and finding
that in fact,
we may have
just missed an
incredible
opportunity to
make a new
friend or gain
a new
colleague.
So next time
you are
listening,
remember:
Ears, Mouth,
Eyes, Heart and
Undivided
Attention.
As a Native
American quote
says:
“Listen, or
your tongue
will keep you
deaf”.
Wise words
indeed.
To
make
you
Smile:
Am
I
Normal?
It
doesn’t
hurt
to
take
a
hard
look
at
yourself
from
time
to
time
and
this
should
help
you
get
started.
During
a
visit
to
the
mental
asylum,
a
visitor
asked
the
Director
what
the
criterion
was
which
defined
whether
or
not
a
patient
should
be
institutionalised.
“Well,”
said
the
Director,
“we
fill
up
a
bathtub,
then
we
offer
a
teaspoon,
a
teacup
and
a
bucket
to
the
patient
and
ask
them
to
empty
the
bathtub”
“Oh,
I
understand,”
said
the
visitor.
“A
normal
person
would
use
the
bucket
because
it’s
bigger
than
the
spoon
or
the
teacup”.
“No.”
said
the
Director,
“A
normal
person
would
pull
the
plug!
Do
you
want
a
room
with
or
without
a
view?”
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PASS
THIS
ON.
CLICK
HERE
TO
BRIGHTEN
AND
INSPIRE
SOMEONE
ELSE'S
DAY.
|
Because we
like them
We decided
that each month
we would
include a few
links to other
sites, either
because we know
the people
concerned and
think they are
great or we
were inspired
by the site and
wanted to share
it with you. By
the way, these
are not
affiliate links
and no money is
received for
including
them.
www.goodnewsnetwork.org
Just what it
says!
Many thanks to
my friend, and
numerologist
Julie Chimes
for this.
http://www.theforgivenessproject.com/stories/julie-chimes
As a result of
miraculously
surviving a
brutal attack
in 1986, a
friend of mine,
Julie Chimes
received the
ability to
"see" into
souls and
part of the
amazing work
that she now
offers, is to
create
insightful
personal charts
based on
ancient
numerology.
All she needs
is your birth
name and date
of
birth.
For cost and
more
information,
email
jc@rainbowpath.org
You can read
more of her
remarkable
story at the
web address
above.
www.avaaz.org
This is true
people power in
action, making
a real
difference in
the world. This
is how they
describe
themselves.
“Avaaz.org is a
community of
global citizens
who take action
on the major
issues facing
the world
today. The aim
of Avaaz.org is
to ensure that
the views and
values of the
world’s people
shape global
decisions.
Avaaz.org
members act for
a more just and
peaceful world
and a
globalisation
with a human
face.”
Really useful
information.
I recently
found out that
if you are
involved in an
accident or
incident but
are unable to
call emergency
services or you
don’t know your
location, just
key 112 into
your mobile
phone and they
will locate you
using satellite
technology. I
think this only
works in the
UK.
If you know of
a similar
system in other
countries,
please let me
know and I’ll
pass it on.
If you
have some
really useful
information
that you’d like
us to share
with other
readers in the
forthcoming
issues, email
me
at
and of
course, we’ll
attribute the
information to
you.
FINALLY........
John asked me
to let you know
that he
recently posted
“Using your
mind to change
your
mind” on
his blog, which
you can find at
http://www.johnglostersmith.com/blog.
Enjoy!
If you have
enjoyed this
newsletter and
know of
somebody else
who would
benefit from
it's message,
please forward
it to them and
suggest that
they subscribe.
Click
here
to pass it
on.
If this has
been forwarded
to you
Click
here
to sign up and
ensure you
receive your
own
regular......
Breath
of Fresh
Air
SIMPLY DIVINE
CEREMONIES
Beautiful,
personalised
and heartfelt
ceremonies
created and
conducted for
you by
Reverend Akasha
Lonsdale,
Interfaith
Minister.
*Weddings
*Baby
Blessings/Naming
*Vow
Renewals
*Civil
Partnerships
*New
House and
Business
Blessings
*Separation
and Moving
on
*Saying Goodbye
- Funerals and
Memorial
Services
If you are
not in the
UK or too
far away
from
Wiltshire,
then I can
still
create the
ceremony
for
you.
Details of
all the
ceremonies
I offer can
be seen
at:
www.simplydivineceremonies.com
Meantime, to
see details of
everything else
we offer,
visit:
www.empoweringpartnership.com
www.thelaughterschool.com
www.consultexcel.com
Until
next time, John
and I wish you
inspiration,
joy, health and
happiness.
Akasha
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